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Healthy Vs. Unhealthy Relationships

“Change Is Possible If Both People

Really Love Each Other.”

Colette Gallagher (01:48-01:53)

Break-up and divorce rates are getting higher nowadays. Many people miss the red

flags of unhealthy relationships. The breakups are due to a lack of experience in

handling key relationships. Or anything that has to do with forming an intimate bond. In

this episode, Colette Gallagher shares her perspective about healthy and unhealthy relationships.

Part One of ‘Healthy Vs. Unhealthy Relationships’

Do you have to be attracted to someone to date them? There's nothing wrong if your'e

not that physically attracted to someone. Those are hormones, and lots of things go into

why we're excited about someone and why we're not. You know you couldn't see

yourself with that person in the long-term. You waste months or years together. And you still end up breaking up with that person.

As a result, you hurt more people if you don't know what's the purpose of that

relationship. Some of you had relationships where the other person doesn't feel the

same way as you do. You're trying hard to earn someone's love and affection. You're

trying to be somebody that they would like. You changed yourself entirely like a different

person. You did things that you weren't interested in so that you could be with that

person. It is not fun to always be the one putting in the effort to make someone happy. Especially if it's to the point where you're putting someone else's happiness first.

“Be happy and find a relationship with someone who you can share that happiness with.” – Colette Gallagher (26:58-27:41)

Many people don't have good role models for a healthy relationship. You're lucky if

you're one of those kids who grew up in a loving family, where you've learned what good relationships should be. For the people who had a different upbringing, the drama, jealousy, yelling, and name-calling are signs of an unhealthy relationship.

A healthy relationship is like dating your best friend but in a way where you feel

attracted to them.

We can always reprogram our relationships in a healthier situation. As a relationship

champion, I'm here to tell you that you can have a healthy relationship because it is possible to change things if both people love each other and want to change things.

Part Two of ‘Healthy Vs Unhealthy Relationships’

People are overlooking a bunch of stuff at the beginning that will be a big deal in the

future. For instance, you are not able to express what you need and desire in a

relationship. When you can't say certain things, or they're going to explode. You always have a choice with how you're feeling. You're allowed to have a life that you love in any

relationship. Express how you feel without blaming anyone. It's taking responsibility for

how you're feeling. Then knowing that you're sharing it for yourself so that they know. Communication is so important in a relationship.

If you feel like you can't be yourself, you can't communicate, you can't be comfortable then, that's not a healthy relationship. Trust is also important in relationships. It's not worth being in a relationship with someone where you feel like you have to watch them always.

“A relationship strengthened by love and friendship will always work no matter what.” – Colette Gallagher (29:53-30:29)

Just like friends, have some fun. Lift each other up. Speak kind words into each other. If

someone has a bad day, try to cheer them up. What can we do to move forward? What

can we do to make it better? Figure out how to work things out together. Exchange

suggestions if you're both having struggles with something. Take time to listen to each other's thoughts.

Here's another sign of a healthy relationship. When you're the first person that they

think of when something exciting happens. Sharing your life and staying committed to the relationship no matter what.

How to Get Involved

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